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Message: Questions re punching? and stretching.

From: vikingdreamnz Sent: 18 Mar. 2002 Message 1 of 2

Hi, and thanks very much for this site. I'm pretty new with fisting - only 11/2 times really. But I'm concerned at the feeling of the guy 'punching' me - I guess my cervix? Is that damaging? I love fisting so far - such a turn on, but don't want to wreck my body! Also, from what I've read in your site so far, it seems that if I carry on with fisting my vagina will stretch and stay that way? Is that right? If so will sex in the future become less satisfying unless always fisting and/or toys? And, can men (when having sex) and doctors (at examinations) tell? Thanks for any feedback.

From: Joe Sent: 18 Mar. 2002 Message 2 of 2

Hello, and welcome to the community.

> But I'm concerned at the feeling of the guy 'punching' me - I guess my cervix? Is that damaging?

I don't particularly like your use of the word "punching". For Cindy and me, at least, fisting is a fairly gentle and slow process, and Cindy is mostly turned on by the sensation of being stretched and the in-and-out motion's friction.

I have fisted another woman who was more turned on by the forcefulness of the motions. "Do it harder!" she'd say often while I was fisting her, but even when I did do it as hard as she liked I still wouldn't really call it "punching".

My advice is that as long as you think it feels good then there probably isn't anything dangerous happening. But if the "punching" is something your partner is not doing at your request, and if it doesn't feel good, then perhaps your partner is being too violent and you should demand that the fisting be done more gently.

> Also, from what I've read in your site so far, it seems that if I carry on with fisting my vagina will stretch and stay that way?

You should be doing Kegel exercises to keep your vaginal muscles in tone. If you do that regularly your vagina won't stay stretched. There is some information about this in the "Excite club archives" section, and also some links in the "Links" section.

> If so will sex in the future become less satisfying unless always fisting and/or toys?

There have been several threads about this, some from back in the Excite club days and some since. (Which reminds me that it's time I tried to make an archive of the new information that has accumulated on this message board during the last year and a half.)

Cindy (whose vagina has become somewhat permanently stretched because she hasn't been completely consistent in doing Kegel exercises all the time during the last nine years) says that she still gets just as much pleasure out of feeling me inside her as she always has. I conclude that her vagina is very sensitive, but I don't know if that is true for all women.

For the man it is largely a mental thing. I can sometimes hardly feel if I'm inside Cindy or not, and for me that adds to the excitement. But for some men this might be a major problem.

> And, can men (when having sex) and doctors (at examinations) tell?

If your vagina becomes loose (which shouldn't happen if you do Kegel exercises) and if you've had children then you can just say that your vagina became loose during childbirth and never recovered. If you haven't had children then I suppose that one possible conclusion could be that fisting or some other stretching activity is responsible, but I'm sure there are other possible explanations, so I don't think anyone can draw a completely certain conclusion from the looseness of a vagina.

I hope this helps, and please remember that I'm an informed fan of vaginal fisting but I'm not an authoritative source of information, so please do research elsewhere too.

Yours,
Joe