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Message: Getting started

From: ronnip_isfall Sent: September 20, 1999 Message 1 of 14

my wife and i have tried to fist ,but my hand almost gets all the way in...but the knuckle area is pretty wide i guess...four fingers..no problem! any tips would be appreciated?

thank you for your time... huggs r&r

From: Cindy-CindyAndJoe Sent: September 20, 1999 Message 2 of 14

Dear r&r,

Most important you need lots of patience and lubricant (water-based). It should work eventually. How long have you been working on it?

Have you read my story "Two hands are almost enough" in the Files area? There are some tips there and a description of my experiences.

There's another "how to do it" article in the Files area, and several "how to do it" links in the Links area too.

Hope this helps. Ask again about anything specific.

Yours,
Cindy

From: gharvey9 Sent: September 22, 1999 Message 3 of 14

Cindy
My hubby and I have been enjoying fisting for several months now, we now manage a full fist. I wanted to know is there anything dangerous about fisting at all, can any damage be done to your bowel or cervix ext. I read your reveiw of a hand in the bush and feel that yourself and Joe would be the perfect people to seek a few answers because of your experience, I have also found that most sites refering to fisting can't help themselves but add words like slut, jam it up, ect, what a lot of people fail to understand is that it can be a wonderful conection with your life long partner, you need to trust the fister and the fister needs to have a vast knowledge of their partners facial expression, breathing rythem and tolerance. ENJOY !!!

Regards,
Lyn

From: Cindy-CindyAndJoe Sent: September 23, 1999 Message 4 of 14

Dear Lyn,

Thanks for your posting. It's nice to hear from a woman.

I can't claim any solid knowledge, but presumably anything that would damage the cervix or bowels would be so painful that you would stop before anything serious happens. My cervix is sufficiently sensitive that an activity becomes unpleasant before it feels like it could possibly be harmful.

This kind of thing might be dangerous for someone who is into masochism, and gets turned on by real pain, but for the rest of us I doubt it can be a problem.

I have not had any problems of the type you're asking about, and have been engaged in fisting for six years.

Remember that your partner should always wash his hands before fisting you, and keep his fingernails short and very clean.

Solid knowledge about the health aspects of fisting are impossible to find, I'm afraid. As you say, most fisting sites on the Internet are commercially oriented for men who just download the pics for gratification.

What concerns me more than the things you mention is that my pelvic muscles may become very stretched, so I might lose bladder control, or my uterus might descend. For that reason I do contraction exercises every day.

Incidentally, my pelvic muscles have probably been stretched so much that they can't ever return to the state they would have been in if I'd never gotten into fisting. But I don't see this as a problem.

How did you and your husband get into fisting? I'm always curious to hear about this, as it is not a very common sexual activity.

Yours,
Cindy

From: Joe-CindyAndJoe Sent: September 23, 1999 Message 5 of 14

Dear Lyn,

I'd just like to supplement by saying that it's nice that you talk about the emotional aspects of fisting. Concepts like love and trust are almost never talked about on sex-related web sites.

I'm torn between wanting this site to be a success, which is easiest to measure in terms of number of members, and wanting this site to be very different from the commercial sex sites which cater to men who only download pics. But now that there are 70 members, almost none of whom participate actively, Cindy and I have decided to tone down the porno-like blurb on the Welcome page.

To get back to love and trust, yes, fisting does imply and require lots of both for it to work well. This web site is our way of trying to broadcast that message, and to communicate with other people who are into fisting.

Yours,
Joe

From: RuthM16 Sent: September 24, 1999 Message 6 of 14

ronnip isfall
When you start in fisting I found it was easier at first to go buy one of the rubber fist and use plenty of oil and play with that for awhile and then work your hand slowly with the toy. After awhile you won't need the toy and your hand will work after some play time.
Later

From: hushlore Sent: November 1, 1999 Message 7 of 14

As I said in my intro, I've only been fisted once. I think we made it to his thumb before I got scared. And it was extremely emotional for me, I cried a little, and not from pain.

He's promised me that next time he'll hold my hand, too. He found that touching, that I would need both extremes.

~hushlore

From: grosvagin Sent: November 2, 1999 Message 8 of 14

As a discussion gets going, it tends to take on a life of its own and so my comment will only indirectly address the initial question.
To me at least, sex should be about fun, love, compassion and mostly getting intimate with your partner, as in truly getting to know him or her. True intimacy comes with trust, which in turn fosters openness. When you reach that stage, you can explore sex and make it meaningfull but also extraordinary. And so you can start exploring areas that are considered kinky or perverse,like fisting, but that in reality are about pleasure. If it is pleasing to both partners, you should do it, but you should not push it past where it feels confortable. Respect your partner's limits and, lord knows, if you have reached the level of intimacy discussed above, you will probably come back to where you had left off later on. For example, i dont take a whole fist, i prefer to take large objects, eggplants mostly, because they don't have sharp edges. That is as much fun for both of us, but we may get to fisting eventually as i feel very safe with my partner.
Hope this helps,
Grosvagin

From: rngnfl Sent: November 2, 1999 Message 9 of 14

Here again we have to agree with most on this it does take alot of love and trust to do fisting , with us my wife can take most of my had up to the thumb but a freinds hand she can get in because it is smaller than mine. And Grosvagin sheis like u loves big things like the egg plant and dildo's, we both enjoy it and that is the way it should be for everyone fun andenjoyable and not a task..

From: flormo Sent: November 29, 1999 Message 10 of 14

You have a great site. I really feel that "fisting" is probably more commone than you think. Cindy, I really don't think your ability to take the whole hand (hands) has anything to do with your size as you mentioned in your story. I think you have a great body by the way, but my girlfriend is 5ft 5" and 130 lbs and loves to be fisted. Many times she'll tell me "Fist me- stick your fist deep inside my cunt - fill me up all the way". We have been doing this for a couple years. She had been married for 18 years and her ex never did this for her, but she told me that she had done this before long time ago. I certainly have turned her into a nymph but we both enjoy it alot. By the way, I have found it more difficult to achive orgasam after a session of fisting if we try "normal" loving making afterwards. Many times she will put her own hand in her pussy while we're making love and I usually have no problem then. I could go on and on but just wanted to pass on this lil titbit.

From: Cindy-CindyAndJoe Sent: November 29, 1999 Message 11 of 14

Hi flormo,

Thanks for your comment.

If Joe has trouble coming then he usually uses one hand as well as his cock in my pussy. He sort of reaches down around my leg and inserts his hand from behind. We call this the "modified missionary position" :-)

That's my favorite position - I really like that double feeling of hand and cock. Sometimes when Joe opens his hand inside me I feel really stretched and aroused.

How about posting another message under "Member introductions"?

Yours,
Cindy

From: zappaz1 Sent: November 30, 1999 Message 12 of 14

Using a hand beside the penis in the vagina is very effective for those that have any difficulty.

I have been very disappointed with the Internet sites.. other than this one, as they seem to just promote fisting as something nasty. Fisting is an "ultimate mutual sexual experience". It is the pinnacle of sexual eroticism instead of "something nasty". I have found that there are many more who have done fisting than admit to it. I think the reason for this is that most feel there is some stigma connected with it and the "something nasty" approach of adult sites tends to make people even more into being "closet fisters".

Fisting is a respectable activity in consenting adults, and should be approached as such. Hopefully this site will do a lot to change the previous attitude so many people have about it. I wish to thank Cindy, Joe, and the others on this group who stand up for the "respectability and supreme eroticism"... that vaginal fisting deserves... along side other forms of sexual relations. Fisting by heterosexual couples in love deserves more respect!! Even the more potentially dangerous fisting done by gay men seems to have a better reputation.

My only reserve is how very little is published for those interested in the subject. It seems to me that very little is known about the many facets of vaginal stretching and fisting... even by the very people who so love this activity.

Thankfully with time and knowledge this picture will soon change. Personally I think pioneers like Cindy and Joe will be the catalyst for change.

From: gharvey9 Sent: December 26, 1999 Message 13 of 14

Dear Cindy & Joe
I have just read the replies to my letter from sept. My hubby has had an interest in fisting for several years and we have slowly experimented knuckle by knuckle. Your site is the only sex related site that I find interesting because I get to learn both the hubby and wife side of things. I find the majority of sex sites a complete yawn, I enjoy fisting and a lot of other activities with my husband so I feel no need to constantly search the net for comercialised shit, it upsets me to see such trusting enjoyable things like fisting turn into a ooh arr ohh arr plastic blonde wanking visa card enter now crap activity for men to waste time on alone instead of trying the real thing with their loved one.
I would like to hear from any members about what types of lubricants you all use, because we have been caught out a few times before. Wishing you all good health and contentment for the new year ahead.
Lyn & Graham.

From: Cindy-CindyAndJoe Sent: December 27, 1999 Message 14 of 14

Hi Lyn,

Welcome back!

I agree with what you say about most Internet sex sites. Wow, can you believe that men actually use money on this sort of stuff? Oh dear, oh dear :-)

I've posted a message about lubricants under "General discussions about fisting".

Yours,
Cindy